Not My Life
by RaiseYourVoice
Summary: BEING REWRITEN! Harry is attacked on Private Drive. He wakes up with no memory. Voldemort uses this to his advatage. Will Harry ever get his memory back? Harry is taught under Voldemort's care, as Alex. Rating may change.
1. Privite Drive

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. I wish I did though. Its brilliant!

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter One**

It was a hot sunny day on Privet Drive. The sun shone brightly in the sky. All the neighbors were inside their houses keeping out of the heat. The only person outside was a boy who went by the name of Harry Potter.

Harry reached up to wipe the sweat off his forehead. He had been working on the garden for the past hour. He was relived he was finally finished. Now he could go to the porch to wait for his relatives, the Dursley's, to return home. They had taken their son to a museum for one of his friend's birthday parties. This left Harry home alone. Vernon locked him out of the house in fear that he would break something while they were away. Getting up Harry brushed the dirt off his warn and torn jeans. Going over to the water hose he took a long drink. The water from the hose was warm from being in the sun, but he was thirsty and it was water. When his relatives got home, he could get a glass of ice water. Harry put all the tools away and went to wait in the back of the house on the porch.

Two hours later he heard a car drive into the drive way. He could hear car door's slamming and people talking. Harry waited for his aunt to come to the back door and let him in. He knew they wouldn't let him in through the front because of how dirty he was. Petunia and Vernon, his aunt and uncle, were always worried about what the neighbors thought. If he went up to the front to be let in as they came in all he would get would be a stern lecture. He preferred to avoid that lecture by waiting.

Finally he could hear the locks to the back door clicking unlocked. Harry got up from the step he had been waiting on and opened the door letting himself in. His aunt was in the refrigerator getting food out for supper.

His aunt never spoke to him as he went through the kitchen and up to his room. But he did see her checking to make sure he didn't track any dirt into her clean kitchen. Going upstairs he went to his room. He could hear his cousin come up the stairs and go into his room and turn on the television. After a while the murmur of the television as well as his family moving around lulled him to a light sleep. Working outside in the hot sun hid tired him out.

A screeching yell woke him up. Looking around to try and see what was wrong he quickly jumped off his bed and slowly opened his door and slowly climbed the stairs down. He could hear low voices somewhere in the living room. He wished he had his wand with him, but his uncle had taken it when he'd come home. Slowly, avoiding the creaking stair, he made his way into the hallway and toward the living room. Peeking inside, he could see two large men in back robes standing over his relatives. His cousin, noticing his presence, looked over at him gaining the two intruders attentions to Harry as well.

The one closest to him turned toward him and began coming closer. Harry stepped back and ran as far as he could down the hall. He opened the latch to the cubberd, his old cubberd, and jumped inside. He waited till he heard the footsteps pass the cupboard and jumped out. He knew the Death Eater would have looked in the cupboard a few seconds later anyway. Might as well surprise him.

And surprise the Death Eater he did. The man turned around and pointed his wand at Harry, but before he could fire off any spells, Harry had snapped the wand in the mans hand. The mans was stunned for a moment before gaining his composure back, and he began to try and get Harry to the ground in order to hold him down so he could not run. But Harry managed to wriggle out of his grasp and ran for the back door in the kitchen. He had almost reached the door when the Death Eater grabbed him around the legs, tripping him.

Harry hit the ground with a loud thud. He had hit his head hard on the kitchen floor when he'd tripped. He was momentarily unconscious, but a minute later blearily opened his eyes to the Death Eater standing over him. The man grabbed something and brought it down, hitting him again. And Harry lost consciousness again.

**End of Chapter One**

A/N: Well, I hope you all enjoyed my first chapter! Please read and review! I'm not stopping on writing my other stories. This one, I have been writing for a few weeks now. I've been thinking about how to write it for a long time though! I'm almost half way through.

**Next Chapter:** Harry wakes up with no memory and in the Dark Lord's mansion! What will Voldemort do?


	2. Who Am I?

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. I wish I did as does everybody else.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter Two **

Slowly Harry opened his eyes. He was lying on hard ground which he realized to be concrete. He had a horrible headache. One that felt like someone was hammering your head. Looking around, he could see a bare room.

_Where am I?_ He thought.Thing's were blurry. He couldn't think too clearly. Come to think of it he couldn't even figure out _who_ he was. All he knew was he was in a concrete room that had very little light and that his head hurt. Reaching up he gently touched where his head hurt. He winced as he touched a really tender area. Bringing his hand back down he looked at his hand. There was red sticky stud there._ Blood._ He thought.

The was a loud clicking and a door opened. Light bathed the room making his wince even more. It made his head pound more. Finally, after the people entered the room, and the door closed he opened his eyes to look at them.

He counted five people, all in black robes. One stepped closer and Harry got a better look at him. He looked monstrous. He had slits for eyes. Looking closer he could make out red eyes. The man sneered at him as he came closer.

"Well, well. What do we have here?" The man said mockingly.

"Who are you?" Was the only thing the boy could think to say.

"What do you mean, Brat?" The monstrous man said.

"Who are you?" The boy repeated. "What do you want?"

The man stepped closer. "What are you playing at!"

The boy didn't answer this time. The man stepped even closer and brought a skinny pale hand up forwards the boy's face. For a moment he thought he'd be hit, but the man grabbed his chin and looked at his face. A moment later he took his hand away.

"Crabbe! Clean him up, and figure this out. I want you to report to me when your finished!" The man said as he stalked out of the room.

The man whom Harry assumed to be Crabbe stepped closer and knelt down to Harry's level. Harry noticed everyone else left the room and the door again closed. He heard a clicking sound again and then the only sounds he could here were coming from the man in front of him.

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Two hours later Crabbe stood up and knocked on the door to be let out. He had spent the past two hours speaking with the boy and cleaning and healing his wounds.

Once the door opened he stalked out of the room and went to the main room of the house. It was a large, old mansion.

Entering the main room he could see the Dark Lord sitting at the table. The Dark Lord looked up as he entered.

"What were your findings, Crabbe?"

"I healed his injuries. I have spoken with him." Crabbe began.

"And what did he say." The Dark Lord asked, genuinely curious. "Why does he claim not to know who I am."

"I have spoken to him about that." Crabbe continued. "In my opinion he has amnesia."

"No memory? Of anything?" The Dark Lord asked shocked.

Crabbe nodded. "Yes. No memory of magic. No memory of where he grew up. No memory of his friends. No memory of anything. His first memory he can tell me of is waking up here."

The Dark Lord stayed quiet for a moment. He motioned for Crabbe to sit down at the table with him. After Crabbe sat down the Dark Lord finally voiced his thoughts.

"Do you believe he will get his memory back?"

"With the type of injury he sustained, I would say its possible either way. He may recover his memory and he may not. Only time can tell."

"If he did recover his memory, when?"

"Honestly, any time. It could be days, months, years, or never. Only time can tell." Crabbe answered honestly.

The Dark Lord again stayed quiet for a few moments.

"What if I trained him." The Dark Lord questioned.

"What do you mean, my Lord?"

"Trained his like us. Like my protégé?" The Dark Lord asked.

Crabbe thought a moment. It could work, so long as he didn't gain his memory back. "For now, as long as he did not get his memory back, I think it could work. He would still essentially be the same person, though. Same habits. Same traits. He just doesn't know anybody, or anything about himself."

"But it could work?" The Dark Lord asked.

Crabbe nodded. "I believe so, yes."

The Dark Lord again stayed quiet. After a moment he spoke again. "Set him up in a room. A comfortable room, mind. How often does his injury need to be examined?"

"For now I would like to check his injuries to make sure they are healing properly once a day at least. His apatite might not be very good for a while though."

"Why is this?" The Dark Lord asked.

"Well, two reasons. Because of his head injury, and because of the shock of not having a memory. Emotionally that has to be difficult to handle." Crabbe reasoned.

The Dark Lord nodded in understanding. "Would there be any other complications because of his head injury?"

"Dizziness, headaches, throwing up. Possible some weakness." Crabbe listed out. "All of this would last for about two weeks."

The Dark Lord again nodded. "Get him set into a room comfortable. Notify me when you are done."

Crabbe nodded and left the room.

Lord Voldemort sat there in his chair thinking of the latest developments. _Now, I can train him as my own. I may not have to kill him. Maybe, I can get him to believing he is one of us, and always has been. _Lord Voldemort smiled._ This is better than I could have hopped for. _

**End Chapter Two.**

A/N: I hope you all like the new chapter! I had fun witting it! Please Read and Review!

In this story Crabbe is a healer. He is certified.

**Next Chapter:** Harry wakes up.


	3. Waking

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. I just wrote this story.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter Three**

Slowly his eyes opened. This time, though, he was in a soft comfortable bed. Looking around he could see the room was colored in dark greens and blues. Very well decorated from what he could see. His vision was still blurry. Looking down, he could see he was dressed in these medium blue silk pajamas. He remembered being in a concrete room and meeting a creepy man who seemed to be the boss of everyone else. Then talking with a man he remembered being named Crabbe. The man kept asking him all these questions. The man gave him something that made him sleep afterwards.

The door opening caught his attention. He squinted to see the new arrival. The man came closer and he recognized he to be Crabbe.

"Mr. Crabbe?" He asked a bit unsure.

"Hello Alex." Crabbe said in a pleasant voice, smiling. "Let me have a look at you to make sure your injury is healing properly. You had a bad fall earlier."

The Dark Lord had and he had already spent the past two hours after he'd gotten Harry to bed about a plan to explain things to Harry. They named him Alex. A fitting name in both of their opinions. The planned on telling everyone he was the son of a close friend of the Dark Lords, who had been killed a year prior. They had changed his appearance while he'd been sleeping as well. Instead of short messy black hair, he now had dishwater blonde hair that was strait that was a little past his shoulders. They had also charmed his eyes from green to blue. They planned on teaching the boy over the summer, and if they believed him capable of handling it, going to Hogwarts for schooling. But for now, they would treat the boy as if he were part of the Dark Lords family.

"Alex? Accident?" Alex asked confused.

"Yes. Earlier you took a pretty bad tumble. Your uncle was pretty worried." Crabbe said smiling.

"Hugh?" Harry asked completely confused.

"Sorry. I keep forgetting." Crabbe said giving him a sympathetic look. "Because of your head injury from the fall, you lost your memory. Hopefully you will gain those back soon."_ Hopefully not._ Crabbe thought to himself. "How are you feeling?"

Alex was utterly confused. But answered Crabbe anyway. "My head hurts."

Crabbe nodded. "Headache?" He asked. Harry shook his head. "Well if you get one, tell somebody and I'll give you a headache reliever potion."

"Potion?" Harry asked.

Crabbe nodded. "Yes. Potion."

"I thought potions were magic." Harry stated. As far as he knew potion didn't exist.

"Yes, it is." Crabbe stated matter of fact.

"But magic doesn't exist, does it?" Harry asked frowning.

"Yes it does exist, Alex." Crabbe frowned. He hoped his memory loss didn't make it difficult to re-train him in magic. "Looks like were going to have to re-teach you magical skills then. It shouldn't take too long. Since you knew it once. I'll inform your uncle so he can set up some tutoring." Crabbe said still examining Alex.

"Who is my uncle?" Harry asked still confused. He felt odd asking such a question, but knew he needed to know.

"You'll see him in a moment." Crabbe stated. "He's been worried."

Harry didn't reply to that.

About five minutes later Crabbe stood up. "I'll go get your uncle." He then left the room.

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Crabbe went to the main room again where the Dark Lord sat.

Looking up he saw Crabbe approaching and stood. "How is he?"

"Still no memory." Crabbe stated. "He doesn't remember a thing about magic. But I don't believe it will take him long to re-learn everything he knew."

Voldemort nodded and followed him out of the room. Opening the door to Alex's room he entered with Crabbe following. Harry was sitting up in the bed. Voldemort sat down next to the boy on the bed.

"Hello, Alex. How are you feeling?" He asked. He knew he'd have to act like he was close to the boy in order to gain his trust.

"Okay." Harry answered after a moment, looking at him inquiringly.

"I'm your uncle." Voldemort said as he noticed the look he was receiving. "Uncle Tom, or Tom."

Harry nodded.

"Are you tired?" Tom asked. "Hungry?"

Harry nodded indicating both.

"I'll go get something." Crabbe said as he left the room.

"How are you feeling, Alex?" Tom asked.

"Confused." Harry stated bluntly.

Tom smiled. _Still strait to the point, I see._ He thought. "I suppose that's expected. Crabbe says you'll need to stay in bed for a few days, and even after that you need to take it easy." Tom informed Alex.

Harry nodded.

The door opened catching both their attentions. Crabbe came in carrying two treys of food. He set the trey gently down in front of Alex and handed Tom the second. "Drink this first." He held up a vial speaking to Alex. "It's a nausea potion. It will settle your stomach so you can eat. Eat as much as you can. If you can't finish it then set it aside. Someone will retrieve the leftovers later. Take this once your done. It's a sleeping potion." At Alex's nod he bid farewell and left the room telling Alex and Tom he'd be back later to check on Harry.

Tom stayed and ate with Alex. They talked about Alex's past, or the story Tom and Crabbe had created for Alex's past.

Tom noticed Harry push the trey slightly away. He picked the trey up and set it aside and lifted the vial of sleeping potion. "Drink this, Alex. I'll see you in the morning." He watched as Alex drank the potion and settled back in bed. Tom tucked the covers around the boy and watched as he rapidly fell sleep. Tom stood up a few moments later and blew the candle out then went to the door. As he shut the door he looked back at the figure sleeping in the bed.

_Yes,_ He thought, _his plans were falling into place._

**End Chapter Three**

A/N: Thank you for reading my latest chapter! I hope you all enjoyed it! I certainly enjoyed writing it!

Next Chapter: Grimauld Place


	4. Grimauld Place

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter Four**

(Order Headquarters/ Grimauld Place)

Two days had passed since Auror Tonks and Auror Moody had discovered the Dursley's dead and Harry missing. Since then, the had been searching for a missing Harry.

At the moment everyone was sitting in the kitchen holding a Order meeting.

"Has there been any news on Harry?" Sirius asked concerned for his Godson.

Dumbledore shook his head negative. "No. Sorry, Sirius. We are not giving up hope. We will still continue to search."

"What do we know so far? Anything?" Molly Weasley, who considered Harry like a son, asked.

Moody spoke up. "The attack must have occurred during our shift change that day." Dumbledore tried keeping at least two Aurors there every day to protect Harry. He had done this for a few years now. " They killed all the Dursley family. Including Harry's owl, Hedwig. We found a spot of blood, which we have confirmed to be Harry's, on the floor and on a cooking rolling pin."

"Any idea where he might be? Has it been confirmed that Harry is with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?" Remus Lupin asked. He had known Harry as a baby. His parent's had in fact been some of his best friends. Then, in Harry's third year, he had been the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. He had gotten to know Harry and really cared for him.

Professor Severus Snape spoke up. "I haven't heard anything. The only thing I can say is that the Dark Lord is keeping quiet about something. But I'm not sure what it is."

"Do you believe it to have something to do with Harry?" Dumbledore asked.

"I honestly don't know, Albus." Snape answered.

"What can we do, then?" Arthur Weasley asked. His wife was Molly Weasley. He also, considered Harry to be part of the family. He and his family had all been devastated when they learned that Harry was missing and the Dursley's were dead. He and his wife never told the children everything they knew though. They didn't tell them about the blood that had been found. They knew that would scare them worse.

Albus Dumbledore sighed. He truly, at this moment, looked like his 150 year old self. He usually looked happy and jolly, with bright twinkling eyes. But right now he seemed old and tired. His eyes held no twinkle in them. "The only thing we can do is continue searching. Hopefully we'll get a lead. Then, and only then, can we go any further on finding Harry. And hopefully we can bring him home soon." He sighed again. "Keep your eyes open for anything. If you hear anything, don't hesitate to contact me."

The rest of the meeting was short, only talking about what they had found out at the Ministry about the Dursley's deaths or Harry's disappearance. Which was nothing.

The Ministry was also conducting its own search for Harry. But they were having no luck as well. The Order members all believed the only reason Minister Fudge even cared about it was because he wanted the notoriety of finding the Boy-Who-Lived. They were all aware Fudge was well on his way out of the Ministry. Plans were already coming forth in search of a new Minister. Fudge was hoping he could find Harry in order to save his job.

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Upstairs, all the Weasley kids who were not old enough to join the Order, were sitting somberly in Ron's room. The room he shared with Harry when Harry stayed in Grimauld Place. Ginny and Hermione, who had arrived after hearing of Harry's disappearance, were both sniffling from crying. They were all waiting for the Order meeting downstairs, to end so they could find out if there was any news on their friend, Harry.

Finally there was a knock on their door. The door opened and Bill entered.

"Hey, guys." Bill said giving this a little smile.

"Was there any news?" Ron asked immediately.

Bill shook his head. "Not yet. We're not giving up though."

"Do you think he's okay?" Fred asked.

"I don't know." Bill answered truthfully.

Bill noticed Ginny had tears going down her face again and he motioned for her to come over to him. She jumped up and went to him and he pulled her into a hug, rubbing her back as she cried.

Everyone knew Ginny had gotten over her crush of Harry. She considered him as a brother, though.

"Harry's going to be devastated about Hedwig." Ron said suddenly." He really cared about her."

"I know, Ron." Bill said. "Try to get some rest everyone." He said s he gently picked a sleeping Ginny up in his arms and carried her out of the room to put her to bed.

**End of Chapter Four**

A/N: I hope you like the new chapter! Please read and review!


	5. Summer Lessons

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Just the plot to this story.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

Next Chapter: A week later. Lessons. And discussions with Voldemort.

**Reviews:**

**shortnsweet057**

Hello! Thank you so much for informing me of any errors I have! I really apriciate the help! If you are interested, and have the time, I was wondering if you'd be interested in betaing for my stories. I would give you credit of course. If you do agree, I would also love any input you have on the story! I would send you the chapters I have written up and you can help me with the corrections, also if you felt like something was not right in the story or chapter then we could discuss that and change it. I would really apriciate any help! Thank you again!

**Never Odd Or eveN**

Thank you!

**nanners2188**

Thank you!

**emmanmme**

Thank you! I have about 15 chapters written up on this story already so far.

**Baby Dragon848**

Thanks! I like the name Alex too.

**Dead-Luthien**

Thank you!

**Evergreen Sceptre**

Well its not exactly training Alex has. Its more like classes. Though, a form of training may come later. For now he had a tutor in school subjects, mainly to get himself caught up with what he's forgotten in magic.

**Rosie5**

Thanks! I'll try making the sentences longer. But it will be later in the story, I already have about 15 chapter written up.

**Thank you to everybody!**

**Chapter Five**

A week had passed and Alex was allowed out of bed. He still had to take it easy, though.

Currently, Alex was out side on the grounds of the Mansion. He had been spending a lot of time with Tom. Tom spoke a lot of his past. They would eat dinner together in the dining room. Alex had met a few of the Death Eaters, as he learned they were called, who worked for Tom. But his interaction with most of them were limited.

He learned that Tom held meetings with the people who worked for him about twice a week. He was not allowed to go to these meetings though. Tom said that he was too young, and also that they were quite boring. Crabbe, and Matt, who he had recently met, also confirmed how boring these meetings were. They said all they did was talk about business.

Matt was in his late twenties with light brown hair, and light brown eyes.

Alex had met Matt a few days after he had woken up after the accident. He liked Matt. His real name was Mathew, but he preferred being called Matt. Matt spent an hour to two hours each day teaching him magic's, and schooling. They practiced very little magic's though. Tom, unbeknown to Alex, had managed to get his real wand, the 11 inch Phoenix feather wand, from his real uncle's house, from its hiding spot. Matt also taught Alex some small potions. Alex found he enjoyed making some potions.

Alex knelt down next to the lake on the property and looked in. He couldn't see many fish. The ones he did see were small. Hearing something he looked over. It was Matt. Alex stood up as he came closer and walked over to him.

"Hello, Alex. See anything?" He asked smiling.

Alex nodded. "There are some small fish, but nothing big."

Matt nodded. "Well, we need to head inside. You still have some lessons to complete before dinner."

Alex nodded and followed Matt.

About forty-five minutes though the lesson Alex began to grow tired. He still got tired easily, and Crabbe said that he would for a while until his injury healed completely. He also said that Alex may or may not get his memory back. Only time would tell for sure. Matt noticed his charge trying to hide a yawn and frowned. He put his hand over Alex's hand in order to get him to stop chopping the root he'd been chopping for the potion.

"Lesson's are over for the day. Go to your room and take and nap. I'll wake you for dinner." Matt told Alex.

"You're staying for dinner?" Alex asked surprised. Matt and Crabbe stayed sometimes. But Alex had thought Matt would be going home tonight.

"Yes, I am. Your uncle and I need to discuss how your lessons are going later. Go on and take a nap. You're tired, even though you're trying to hide it, as well as change the subject." He said giving the boy a little smirk.

Alex gave a little smile before yawning again. Matt made a gesture for him to go to his room. "Alright. Let me clean this first, then I'll go to my room." Alex said as he began to pick up the small cauldron.

Matt went over to him and took the cauldron from his charges hands. "I can clean up for tonight. You go to your room."

Alex nodded and sighed. "Thank you. I'll see you later."

"Your welcome. Have a good nap."

Alex then left the room. Sighing Matt began to dump the cauldron in the sink. After casting a cleaning and drying spell he placed the cauldron in the cupboard that contained all of Alex's potion making materials.

_I know I'm not supposed to get too attached to the boy, but he found a way to worms his way into my heart._ Matt thought

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Later that night, after supper, and after Alex had gone back to his room, Matt sat with the Dark Lord in the dining room.

"How is Alex doing in his lessons?" The Dark Lord asked.

"He's doing very well, My Lord." Matt answered truthfully. He knew it was stupid to lie to Voldemort. Voldemort always knew when someone lied. "He seem's to enjoy some potions, but not others. He sometimes gets bored discussing magical theory. Usually all I have to do is show him how to do a spell once, and he can do it. But we are still in the basics."

"Do you believe he will have any difficulty when you get more advanced in magic?"

Matt shook his head. "No, I think he will do very well. He may even improve from where he had been."

"Why would that be?" The Dark Lord asked.

"Well, because at the moment he is dealing with one-on-one tutoring. In a classroom there is one teacher and twenty five to thirty kids."

"Would it be a mistake sending him to normal means of schooling, should he be able to handle it?"

"No, I don't believe so. When ever he comes back it might be smart to review what he's learned though."

The Dark Lord nodded. "Thank you, Matt."

Matt nodded. "It's my pleasure, My Lord."

"You are dismissed."

"Goodnight, My Lord."

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Leaving the room Matt sighed. The Dark Lord was a lot more mellow since Alex had come to live there. But he was still scared of him. Matt knew Alex was also worming his way into Lord Voldemort's heart. Even though most would argue that he even had a heart. But it appeared, to Matt, he did posses a heard.

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Voldemort continued to think about Alex's progress. He was happy with how things were going. Alex was adjusting fine. He wasn't questioning too much into the story he'd been told of his past. Voldemort also noticed how he was getting a soft spot for him. As much as he tried, he couldn't help it.

A year ago, had someone told him he'd would one day care for _Harry Potter_ he would have laughed at them and killed them.

Looking at the clock on the wall he noticed it was late. Alex would already be asleep at this hour. It was 3:00 AM. Getting up he left the room.

As he passed Alex's room he opened the door. The room was dark inside. The only thing he could hear was light breathing from a child. Stepping into the room and closer to the bed to get a better look at his charge. The boy was asleep on his side with an arm tucked under the pillow. Voldemort reached out a hand and brushed some of the long hair out of the boy's face. Standing up he left the room and went to bed himself.

**End Chapter Five**

A/N: I hope you all like the latest chapter! Please read and review!

**Next chapter:** The search for Harry.


	6. Life at Grimauld

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Just the plot to this story.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Reviews:**

**shortnsweet057:** Thank you! I need your e-mail to e-mail the chapters to you. Thank you again!

**Dead- Luthien:** I'll try and make the chapters longer. But it will be later in the story.

**Anave Lipad:** Thank you! I have a few memory loss stories in My Favorite Stories on my Bio page. There are a few really good ones there!

**Fayrielchan:** Thank you!

What Voldemort told Alex about his parents: He told him his mum died when he was a todler, and his Dad died the previous year in an accident from work. And that was the reason he'd come to live with Voldemort.

**HoshiHikari:** Thank you! For now things are smooth, but later on they wont be. Alex will start getting flashes of memory.

**ShatteredxDream: **Thank you!

**Evergreen Sceptre:** Yes, Ron was in shock.

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing Not My Life!**

**Chapter Six**

(Grimauld Place)

A month passed with no news on Harry's where 'bouts. The house was very somber. Order members came for the meetings, but left soon after to continue searching or going to work.

Ron, Hermione, Fred and George and Ginny all mostly kept together. Fred and George hadn't done any pranks or cause any ruckus. They knew it wasn't the time to do such things. Ginny and Hermione often had study sessions to keep their minds off Harry. Ron and Ginny often played chess. But the games were really fun. Most of them ended in the middle of a game. Mrs. Weasley cleaned and cooked in access to what she used to. She was using this as means to keep her mind off of Harry. Arthur spent much of his time at the Ministry helping with the search. When he wasn't there, he spent time with his wife and children.

No one had even gotten the slightest lead. Professor Snape had not found out anything more on what was going on with the Dark Lord.

Albus Dumbledore spent much of his time organizing searches and speaking to the press about Harry's disappearance. What time he had left he got ready for the approaching school year. He hopped to have Harry back for the next school year.

Sirius spent much of his time in his room. He was devastated about his godson's disappearance. He didn't know what he'd do with out him. When he wasn't in his room he helped in coming up with plans to search for his godson. He helped any way he could, since he couldn't actually do any foot word in the search. He was still an escaped convict from Azkaban. And the Ministry was still searching for him.

Remus Lupin spent a lot of time searching. But the time he wasn't out searching he spent with his friend, Sirius.

**End of Chapter Six**

A/N: Sorry this chapter is so short. I couldn't figure out anything else to put in it. I'm more concentrating on Harry's time at the mansion, then his friends and their search. So, any chapters involving the search will be short.

**Next Chapter:** Alex at the mansion a month later. The same time as it is in this chapter.


	7. Exploring and decisions

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Just the plot to this story.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Reviews**

**scholcomp:** Thank you!

**Nasuada Moon:** Thank you!

**HoshiHikari:** Thanks for reviewing! I am focusing more on Harry, at least until the others come in.

**shortnsweet057:** Thanks! Your e-mail address doesn't show up. E-mail me at my e-mail and I'll send the chapters.

**Evergreen Sceptre:** Not too long for him to get the hang of magic again, mainly because he used to be able to do magic.

**Willingtonboots:** I didn't know that I had the reviews set up for only signed reviews. Thank you for telling me! I corrected it. I would never have noticed! Thanks again!

**emmamme:** Sometime in the school year, maybe.

**BabyDragon848: **Voldemort cares about Harry now. So yes, he's gone soft with him and a select few others. On Harry becoming light or dark. We'll see. He'll be a bot confused.

**thuyhy-thuyhy:** Thank you!

**Dark-Luthien:** Thank you!

**Chapter Seven**

Alex was finally healed. He didn't tire out so easily any more. He was allowed to do more activity. Matt had re-taught him how to ride a horse, and he found it really enjoyable. Matt went riding with him often. The grounds around the mansion were huge. Alex was shocked at how huge they were. He still hadn't explored them all through. One of the rules Tom had given him were not to leave to property. If he ever had to leave he had to discuss this with him, and then if Tom agreed then he would get somebody to escort him. Alex didn't like the idea of being escorted everywhere, and he voiced this when Tom had asked what he was thinking, and Tom had told him this was for protection. There were many people who wanted to kill Tom. And Tom had also told him that if these people found out about his and Tom's relationship, then they wouldn't hesitate to capture him as well.

In some ways this was true. As far as everyone was concerned he was Alex McKnight. And so far, no one had found out Tom was taking care of him. Those that did find out would find him as a target as well. Weather or not it was to hurt him, Alex didn't know, but he wasn't too interested to take that chance.

At the moment, Alex was on his horse. He was exploring the property. He was in the wooded area. But he hadn't gone far in. He liked it here. There was so much to look for. He loved watching the animals in the forest. He wanted to see what was in here, and planned to come back later when he had more time. It was getting dark outside and he needed to head back to the mansion for dinner.

Slowly he maneuvered his way out of the trees with Hex, his horse. Finally he exited the trees and began to trot to the mansion.

He had been doing well in lessons and really looked forward to most of them. He was getting even further into spells which he enjoyed. Matt said he was almost caught up to where he was before the accident.

Finally the mansion came into view and he made his way around to the barn. Once inside, he climbed off Hex and began to take the riding equipment off of Hex. When he was finished he led Hex to his stall. Patting the horse he told him he'd see him later and ran up to the mansion.

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Lord Voldemort was already seated when Harry came rushing in. He smiled as the boy came closer, still a little out of breath.

"Did you run all the way here, Alex?" He asked smirking a little.

"Yes. I lost track of the time. Sorry." Alex apologized.

Tom nodded. "Sit down, and eat."

After Harry was seated the food appeared.

"Mathew says you are doing well in your studies." Tom stated looking at the boy. Alex looked up and smiled.

"We've been working on a lot more here lately." Harry informed Tom. "Matt says I'm almost caught up to where I was."

Tom nodded. "I am very happy to hear that."

The next few minutes passed in silence and Tom noticed Alex was stewing over something.

"What is on your mind, Alex?" Tom asked frowning.

Alex looked up and hesitated for a moment.

"Umm… I was wondering. Am I going to go to a boarding school or continue tutoring here?"

Tom thought a moment. "Do you not like it here?" He asked teasing the boy.

"No, its not that." Alex answered.

Tom sighed. "It remains to be seen. Which do you prefer?"

Alex thought a moment. "I'd like to try going to boarding school."

Tom nodded. "We'll see. I'll inform you once something is decided."

Alex nodded and supper resumed with small talk. Mostly about what Alex had been up to that day. And about his lessons with Matt.

_Well, looks like I may have to come up with some other plan._ Tom thought as he watched Alex leave the room._ If he does happen to go to Hogwarts, it would have been useful to have him give me information on Dumbledore. But… do I really want him spying for me? I must really be getting soft. Well, at least only a select few see it. I can still see the same boy I have fought over the years, but then again, a different boy. He seems more care-free at the moment. I wonder why that is._

**End of Chapter Seven**

A/N: I hope you all like the new chapter. My computer says I have 47kb so far in this story! (I have 95kb now since I wrote this. Yeah!)

**Next Chapter:** Alex sees something that shocks him about Tom. What will it be?


	8. Lessons and Meetings

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Just the plot to this story.

**Notice:** Hello all! I now have a beta-reader! Shortnsweet057! THANK YOU shortnsweet!

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter Eight**

Alex sighed. He was almost done with his latest potion. His hair was in a French braid going down the back of his head. It kept his hair out of his face, which was good because it got annoying having his hair in his face while cutting and stirring things for the potion. Finally he was done and stepped away from the potion to get away from the fumes.

"Almost finished?" Matt asked from his seat at his desk.

Alex nodded. "Yeah. I just have to let it simmer for ten minutes."

Matt nodded. "Get to your homework in the meantime."

Alex nodded and opened his book bag. Matt had started giving him homework right out of the books. Alex didn't particularly like the homework, but he did it. He knew Tom would be angry if he didn't, and Matt would be disappointed. He wanted neither of these things.

Finally after he'd finished his first work sheet on Defense spells for the Defense Against the Dark Arts subject, he looked up at the clock. It was time to take the potion off simmer and bottle it. After he was done with these he walked up to Matt's desk. Matt looked up as he came closer. Alex handed him a bottle which he examined. After a moment he nodded. "Very good. Color is a little off, but next time get more juices from the leaf." Alex nodded in understanding.

Matt stood up. "Okay, onto the next lesson of the day. Care of Magical Creatures." He said with a smile. He watched as Alex's face lit up. Alex had been looking forward to this since he had told him about the class.

Over the next hour they went though _Fantastic Beasts & Where To Find Them _By_ Newt Scamander._ Matt gave Alex an essay on any information he could find out on the _Acromantula._

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Later that night Alex was seated at his desk with a stack of books in front of him. His uncle was in a meeting with those who worked for him and Alex was left to do his homework. He was scratching away using his quill and parchment. He had a little less than three pages done when a noise caught his attention.

He stopped writing and listened for the noise again. He didn't hear it, and went back to writing. Then he heard it again, but louder. He couldn't exactly make out the sound. It was too muffled. Slowly he got up, leaving the forgotten homework laying on his desk, and left his room.

Walking down the deserted hallway, and down the stairs and into another hallway, he listened for the sounds again.

Coming to a door he put his ear against it. He could hear shouting, and then screaming. He couldn't make out who was shouting though. He was too shocked at hearing these things to do anything.

The door clicked open and he stood there shocked. One of the men he'd seen around was standing at the door. The man also appeared stunned by his presence. Looking inside, Alex could see Tom standing over a man who he could see was in pain.

He could see that everyone was stunned to see him there. Tom had noticed his presence and dropped his wand and came closer.

"Alex." Tom said as he came to the door.

Alex turned around and ran back upstairs and to his room. He didn't even stop when Tom yell his name to stop.

**End of Chapter Eight**

A/N: I hope you all like the new chapter. Sorry for the cliffy. I'll post the next chapter within the next day. I'm trying to space the chapters when I post them by one or two days. Please read and review!

Next chapter: Albus and Severus talk.


	9. Talks part 1

**Not My Life**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter. Just the plot to this story.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**Chapter Nine**

**Talks Part 1**

(Albus Dumbledore's Office)

Albus Dumbledore sighed for what seemed the millionth time. There were only two weeks left till the school year began. He was going through his yearly paper work for the Ministry. He had to inform them of any student's he had who had medical problems. He had to tell them how many Muggle borns there were. He had to get a list ready to send to them after the feast telling them which student was sorted to which house. Finally he finished the medical folder. He had spent the last three hours on it, going though his own records to copy down. Too bad there wasn't a spell to help him. It would make things so much easier. He put his quill down and massaged his hand gently.

Looking up he heard an owl peck on the window. Sighing again he used his wand to open the window to allow the owl access. He recognized the owl as being a _Daily Prophet_ owl. Giving the owl a treat and a knut he untied the paper. The owl ruffled its feathers and took flight again. Albus opened the paper and read the headline.

_**NEW SCHOOL YEAR AT HOGWARTS, NO HARRY POTTER**_

_Hogwarts is opening for the new school year in less than three weeks, and students will be starting the new terms. But one question on many people's minds, is 'Where is Harry Potter?'_

_Harry Potter, also known as the Boy-Who-Lived has been missing since the beginning of the summer. His Muggle relatives were discovered dead. Killed by the killing curse._

_Since then, a search has been under way in search of the most well-known boy in the Wizarding World. But the search has been fruitless. There has been no leads on the where 'bouts of Harry Potter._

_Will Harry join his class mates when the new school term begins? No one knows the answer to this question. _

_Is Harry Potter even alive? We can only hope._

_Continue to E.3 for more, as well as comments from student's who know Harry…_

Albus sighed as he put the paper down. He deeply hoped they found Harry in time for the new year. He'd been hoping that would be the result all summer. Over a month and a half had passed since Harry's disappearance, and there were still no leads.

Albus felt terrible for all those who were truly close to Harry. Who really knew Harry as Harry, not as the Boy-Who-Lived. He knew they all felt terrible. He did as well. He cared for Harry like a grandson, even though he had tried not to get close to him. But he had. And there was no going back. He didn't really want to go back in time to change how he cared for Harry. He was happy to have gotten to know him. He just hoped he was found soon, alive and healthy.

Hearing the gargoyle that guarded the entrance to his office he listened as someone came up the revolving stair case.

"Enter." He called.

The door opened and Albus saw Severus Snape enter the office. Standing up to greet the man he noticed the look on the younger mans face.

"What's wrong, Severus?" Albus asked his brow creasing in concern. "What happened at the meeting?"

Severus Snape had just come from one of Voldemort's Death Eater meetings.

"I was in the meeting, and I saw a boy." Severus said in a rush.

"There are many children of the Death Eaters. Some accompany their parents to the meeting's, Severus. You know this." Albus reasoned.

Severus shook his head. "No. I've never seen this boy before. Jake Samson opened the door and the boy was there. The Dark Lord obviously knows the boy. He called him 'Alex.'"

Albus frowned. "Do you think this has anything to do with Harry's disappearance?"

Severus sighed sitting down heavily on one of the comfortable chairs. "I don't know, Albus. This must be what has had the Dark Lord acting strangely here lately."

"What did the boy look like?"

"He's a teenager. He has strait shoulder-length dark blonde hair."

Albus nodded thoughtfully. "What did Voldemort say about 'Alex'?"

"Nothing. He dismissed us right after, and I came strait here."

Albus again nodded. "Thank you, Severus."

**End of Chapter Nine**

A/N: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the new chapter! Please read and review!

Next Chapter: Tom and Harry talk.

**Note on Life Changed:** For all those who are reading Life Changed. THANK YOU! And I'm sorry for the wait. I had a little of a writters block on the chapter, but shortnsweet057 gave me some ideas. THANK YOU shortnsweet057 for the help. Anyway, the next chapter should be up this week. Thank you for your patience and time!


	10. Talks part 2

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter.

**Summary:** Harry is attacked in Private Drive. He wakes with no memory. The Dark Lord is very pleased with this new development. Will Harry ever get his memory back?

**THANK YOU shortnsweet057 for Betareading this chapter! Your the BEST!**

**Chapter Ten **

**Talks part 2**

(Voldemort and Alex at the Mansion)

After Alex ran from the room, Tom dismissed his Death Eaters. He needed to think about what to tell Alex. Alex had clearly been upset by what he'd seen. Sitting down Tom thought.

_Of course he would be upset about what he'd seen! What do I tell him? _Tom thought angrily. Shocking even himself, he wasn't angry at Alex_. Since he lost his memory he's been kept pretty sheltered about what I, in actual fact, do. What will he think if I tell him the truth of what I do?_ Thinking about it he really didn't care if Alex agreed. Just that Alex still liked him. This revelation shocked him further. He had definitely come to care for Alex._ Well, I had better go talk to him._ He thought as he stood up from his chair.

Coming to Alex's door he knocked. He couldn't hear anything inside. Opening the door the room was dark but he could now hear something coming from the bed. Flicking his wrist to produce his wand from its holster he lit fire to the candle next to the bed.

Looking on the bed, where the sound had come from, he could see Alex laying on his stomach with his head buried in his arms. The boy didn't acknowledge his presence, though. And he found himself not really upset by this. In the past he would have tortured somebody had they acted this way. But he couldn't do that to Alex._ Caring for the boy was NOT part of the plan. How had acting to care for him become something real?_

Sighing he placed a hand on the boy's back. Alex stiffened, but didn't react otherwise.

"I'm sorry you saw that, Alex." _Wow! Now I'm apologizing! Wouldn't the world be shocked!_ He idly thought.

Harry rolled to his side after a moment. "Why were you hurting that man!" He demanded of Tom.

Tom again sighed. "Its part of my job. He didn't complete his task. So he was punished."

"So? Couldn't you have cut pay, or something?" Alex asked.

Tom chuckled. _Like cutting pay would work! Ha!_ "No, that would not have worked."

Alex was silent. He obviously disagreed on this.

Tom spoke after a moment. "This is why I don't allow you to the meetings. I don't want you to see things like that."

"I don't think you should have to hurt people!" Alex said.

Tom sighed. _Well, that settles my question from two months ago.**Question:** Would Alex ever join this business if he never gets his memory back. **Answer:** No._ But surprisingly this didn't upset or anger Tom, shocking himself again. He just wanted Alex to like him and be around. Not if he joined him in his business. _It would have been useful to have him tell me of anything Dumbledore were up to, but I can get the intofrmation from my death eater's children._

"And that's okay." Tom stated after a moment of thought. "I have no choice but to. It's done because of what I'm trying to do, in the big picture." Tom had never told Alex what he hoped to achieve with what he did. And he didn't plan to do so any time soon. Maybe just a little."You don't have to get involved."

"What exactly are you trying to accomplish?" Alex asked curiously.

"Make things better in the world." Tom said. _Well, I suppose it's a half truth. I want to make things better for Pure bloods._

"Then why hurt people?" Alex asked.

"It's the only way I can achieve my goal." Tom answered. "I don't expect you to like it. Or to get involved. Okay."

"Do you have to hurt people though?" Alex asked again.

Tom decided to give a little leeway. "You know those creatures you learn about in Care of Magical Creatures?" After Alex nodded he continued. "Well some are considered dark creatures. But they are not dark. Just as some spells are considered dark, but are not truly dark. Like werewolves. They are only dangerous one time a month. But they are like everyone else the rest of the month. That's not dark. As for spells, like the _Imperio._ The _Imperio_ makes someone have complete control over another. But to be light or dark it depends on a person's intentions."

"Like if someone wants to hurt themselves or someone else you can stop them?" Alex asked.

"Kind of. You can make them do as you wish, basically. But if you want them to do something bad like hurt themselves, then that would be considered dark, correct?"

Alex nodded.

"So, see? It depends on a person intent and interpretation."

"So your trying to correct this?" Alex asked.

"In a sense." Tom hedged. "Are we okay now?"

Alex nodded after a moment. He stills didn't agree with hurting anyone, though. "Yeah." He replied a little reluctant.

"Good." Tom smiled and brought the boy into a light hug. _I truly am getting soft. _He thought.

**End of Chapter Ten**

A/N: I hope you like my new chapter! Tom really does care for 'Alex' doesn't he? ;).

**Next Chapter:** Will Alex goes to Hogwarts?

A/N: I hope you all like the newest chapter! The only reason Alex/Harry is accepting what Tom says, even just a little, is because he doesn't know anything else. He doesn't agree with anyone hurting anyone else. But he doesn't understand or know all that much about what 'Tom' does. So he can't really argue too much about it, other than he doesn't agree to anyone getting hurt. Alex/Harry still doesn't know what Tom wants to accomplish from what he did. And he really doesn't even know what Tom does, job wise.

Alex also has been kept very sheltered. He's met very few Death Eaters. He's not really left the mansion.


	11. Rewrite

Hello everyone! I am going to re-write this story, and I will post the finish when I am done. I will leave this one posted as well, but it will be deleted as soon as I have the re-written one posted.

Thank you everyone! Happy New Years!

1/2/2006


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